Who am I?

We explore the question together.

This isn’t a blog post about my introduction, while writing this post I just wanna explore my inability to answer the question, and maybe find out the reason as to why i’m unable to answer it. I’m 24 now and I still don’t have any of it figured out. All my life I wanted to be an engineer and yet when I became one the happiness didn’t last very long.

Everything starts from school right, we all see dreams, so did I. I just wanted to be a software engineer and a good one. School was fun for me, and college ended in a blink of an eye. Soon I started working as an engineer in a startup, I was working on the things that excited me got projects that I wanted. Work starts getting hard real soon, not because its something you can’t do but only because you start looking at yourself differently. Sometimes we stop learning from mistakes and start punishing ourselves for the things we do.

I also wanted to read books and write music as I was growing up. Papa got a guitar for my younger brother in 2019 and in 2020 I was back home. I spent a lot of time playing guitar and I took it with me when I went to college. Staying mostly in my hostel room I spent a lot of time with my guitar and since then music has always been a very important part of my life. I also dabbled a bit in graphic design and started designing some posters around 2023, I was using my skills with blender and photoshop to create posters that I liked. It was all only for my friends to see.

Now I’m 24 and I love engineering, I also love art but things are getting very real now. I get burnt out and I get stressed music helps and so does art. Yet I fail to answer the question of who am I?

Maybe this is what we all have to figure out as we grow.